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I know what if feels like to not have a friend. I didn’t have many growing up. There were some spells that I had a friend or two (mostly boys, because they were friends with my brother), but then there were a lot of dry spells. I think the longest dry spell was around 13 years old to 18 years old. I began to think it was me; I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough, “modern” enough, skinny enough, which did some damage to my self-confidence.
Even though I didn’t have these close “BFF relationships” growing up, I did have a benefit of having a super awesome mom, who made me feel awesome about myself again, and I developed a super close relationship with my brother. He and I were CLOSE. Still to this day, we love being around each other and hanging out.
Although I have good family relationships, I just felt a little empty, especially when I saw other girls’ selfies with their “BFF”. I just longed for a relationship like that.
Don’t take me wrong…I wasn’t locked in my house! I got out. I socialized. I just never was able to “click” with others like everyone else does. Plus, it doesn’t help that I’m an introvert, so going over to a group of people to try to make friends was just a little to frightening to think about, so I just ended up in a corner. Silent.
when I found friends
It was during my senior year in High School that I found my two best friends. It was during a meeting for the Homeschool graduation that I met them. I had to sit by all the graduates of my class and I happened to sit beside my new friend. We didn’t say much to each other; just the typical, “hi, my name is…” and a few other things. Everyone around us was just chatting and making jokes. We eventually both signed up for the graduation ensemble and our relationship began to grow. I met my other friend at a party my family threw to get some of the graduates together. Check this. Both of my friends and I are introverts…all different levels of introverts, though.
The year afterwards, I met some of more amazing friends, who happen to live in Texas. I flew out on my own to stay with them for a week and can I tell you…I can’t wait to go back! We have dubbed each other “sister”.
Of course, now that I have friends, I had to learn how to be a friend. It was a wonderful thing to learn. *smiles*
why relationships are important
Some of you might not believe that relationships are important, but believe me…they are!
When you don’t have a friend (outside of the family, because in all honesty, your family should be your BEST friends) you begin to feel uncomfortable about yourself. You begin to look at yourself as a dork, ugly, fat, and unlikable. Even God’s word says that having a friend is important!
“Two are better than one, because they have a better a good return for their labor: If either of them fall down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to pick them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
“For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I with them” Matthew 18:20
After having experienced what it is like to have no friends and now have the wonderful joy of calling a handful of people “friend” I can tell you that you will feel different.
My thoughts are filled more about thinking about them (or others, generally). I pray for them. My heart is happy and full.
I am able to tell them about things that are happening in my life and ask them to pray for me. Likewise, they tell me about things about their life and ask me to pray for them. It is amazing. I have grown so much by having a relationship with Christians. It has challenged me to open up a little more than I did before.
Cherish you friends. They are priceless.I will receive commission on any sales made on my blog. To learn more, read my disclosure policy.